Recovery

 “Life’s not about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain”

 Monday evenings storm passed over us leaving a covering of fallen leaves. Twigs and small branches strewn about the lawns and driveway but nothing major thankfully. Tuesday’s travel chaos calmed down for Mum travelling on Wednesday and she departed on time yesterday afternoon. The days have flown by in a blur since coming out of hospital and we are very grateful for all the help mum gave us with cooking, cleaning, physio etc. I have no idea how we would have managed on our own.

Today was my first day on my own for weeks. Mum was here to help after my carpal tunnel op just eight weeks ago and girls were here during the summer. In that time it was trips back and forth to hospital for appointments before the cancer diagnosis. Today I had time to think about the last two months and the whirlwind that swept through our lives. I cried, I felt lonely,I thought about what the future may bring, I was sore. At the site of surgery, the numbness is gradually subsiding but is replaced by a burning sore sensation as the nerves regrow. Paracetamol merely takes the edge off. The cording underarm is improved with physio and massage with bio oil.

We were dealt another blow 10 days ago as Paul announced he is to be made redundant, along with 30 other employees, as of 31^st October. The UK Wireline Department is to close. No big pay off, merely statutory redundancy amounting to 11k for 37 years work. Shocking. With a mortgage still to pay, house not selling and further education expenses for the girls he has no choice but to try to find another job. Not the extra stress that any of us needed right now. The Downstairs apartment is re advertised in an attempt to bring in extra cash but I do not need the physical work at the moment.

I guess its natural that the texts and messages of support subside, especially after Fridays good news. (The blog hits have dropped dramatically after Friday!) Realilty is, I still have several weeks of recovery, reduced energy levels and quite a bit of emotional stuff to deal with. It was good to chat to a friend in England, similar age, who has undergone her own cancer challenge recently. Sharing experiences, thoughts and advice, a great comfort. Hoping to spend some time with her in November.

Still haven’t managed a night out yet, with not sleeping well, I am ready for bed by 9pm! I did have a walk in the rain this evening along the lane before supper. I needed some exercise! Looking forward to a night away at the weekend, the change of scenery will be good for me, getting a bit sick of these walls!

The blog will continue over the coming weeks through recovery and my starting on Tamoxifen. I will record the highs and lows as I pick myself back up and get on with life. We have the challenges of a house sale and job hunting for Paul to overcome and then I hope to face the challenge of getting some travel insurance sorted so I can re plan the Sahara trek that I should have been doing in two weeks time!

I found this rather interesting. Maybe I should take up archery. And men, you'd better watch out!   In Greek mythology the Amazons were a race of women warriors, expert in horse riding and skilled in the use of the bow and arrow and the battle axe. They needed men only to propagate and when they bore male offspring they killed it, maimed it or condemn it to a life of servitude. Amazons were often, but not always, depicted as single-breasted for they removed one breast so they could use their bows unobstructed.